The computer asked me to introduce myself

[Posh]

Hiya!

I have wanted to get into body competitions for years, and this year finally stopped thinking about it and actually did it. I like the shape category best, as I've always wanted to have just a really nice, toned bikini body. I competed in July and felt great. Even though I didn't get my body fat quite as low as I was hoping, I still placed, realised I could do it, and planned to compete again. Unfortunately, I am a comfort eater and as I am going through a hugely stressful seperation, I have eaten my way back to being so fat I'm too embarrassed to go out in public in case I see anyone I know and they notice how not toned I now am. I am the biggest I have ever been in my life, and even weigh more than I did when I was pregnant. While I am only 1kg over the healthy weight range for my height, I can't fit any of my clothes and feel like the fattest person in the world. I'm so embarrassed about the way I look, I'm missing out on all the christmas parties this year, and instead am avoiding most of my friends and have been making up one excuse after another not to attend events. My job requires me to stay out of town a lot, and I also do a lot of driving, so it has been difficult for me to develop a regular exercise routine, and also to get the right foods at the right time. I have a few weeks off at the moment, so am taking the time to get back into exercising and plan my diet. I've been going out early in the morning (when no one is around to see me) to do cardio, but I just use my dumb bells and do a weights routine at home as I don't want the people at my gym to see how big I am now. I just can't believe I have gone from being the best I ever looked in my life to the worst I have have ever looked in my life in just a few short months.

Would love any tips or advice on fighting the cravings, especially at this time of year when there is so much yummy food around.

Best

Posh

[PeterDolan]

Think about how disgusting you feel/look! That should be enough.

Find someone to hold you accountable, I was getting a lady ready for a show and she kept trying to justify to herself that a few pieces of chocolate were alright. I go fucking ape at her, she'd feel so bad that everytime she wanted to, she'd think about how much she was letting me down

[teamfatboy]

Hiya!

Would love any tips or advice on fighting the cravings, especially at this time of year when there is so much yummy food around.

Best

Posh

Tips ?

Water. Water. WATER

Seriously - drink water, keep a big glass around, even at parties. Your hands are full, you'll not want to eat so much 'cos you'll feel full, and you'll even get exercise going to the bathroom.

You can get back there - make 2011 the year you realise the diet you were on when you trained to compete is actually what you have to eat... and make it the year you decide you're worth the effort.

[PeterDolan]

Another thing I've read, go brush your teeth when you crave something, it keeps you busy. NZBB keeps me occupied :pfft:

[Pseudonym]

To be honest, it sounds like you're being pretty hard on yourself. If you're only 1kg over your healthy weight range, you may not be toned, but you're not obese either. Plenty of people have come back from worse.

I know it's easy for me to say, but you need to stop feeling so self conscious and focus on the goal. If you're running around hiding from people, that's just getting in the way of your progress. Use the self-disgust as motivation by all means, but stop looking down and start looking up at the road ahead.

As far as the cravings go, check out the Diet forum for yummy ways of satisfying the crave. There's a lot you can do with protein shakes that won't blow your diet.

[Chemo]

I second the water!

No diet flavorings, they just make you want sweet things.

[Posh]

Wow! So many responses in such a short time! Have just brushed my teeth and am sitting here with a big glass of water. Thanks so much for the messages, they are just what I needed. Whenever I try to talk to my mum about it, she just tells me I don't look that bad and if I can't fit my clothes then I should go and buy some bigger ones. Thanks Mum but that's not the kind of support I need right now! Am heading off to work out now!